***SPECIAL HALLOWEEN REPORT*** Psycho 78 show at Will’s Pub (2012) [8th annual]

Ok I was way,way off about the show. It was last Saturday and I did make it (as I am writing while attending)… but it is pretty lame so far.
Ten minutes later same thing to report, this is not cool in my book. No one to ridicule. Beves assures me Dung and Yakke will be here soon, but I have to work in the morning and it is 10:34 pm already, so I am calling it a night.
The Misfits cover band goes on at midnight and Beves assures me that it is “punk rock” to stay up late, but I’m not seeing it. So I am ending this show review with the sad observation that… I’nl… IBM…
In the sad observatory of the drunk. God I was hammered, Dung and Yakke showed up a few minutes later and it was festive. Seth and his wife also attended (sorry guys, I don’t have any witty nicknames for you), which reminds me that I the been meaning to post about his band for quite some time, which is sk8 punk, and honestly I am so hung over at the moment that I can’t form good thoughts and sentences much less write them.
The band went on at midnight and my BAC was nearing the point where I shouldn’t be in public or speaking to people.
So I excused myself, actually I stumbled off without saying goodbye, and managed to get home without throwing my bike into a lake or hurting myself.
In case you were wondering why I choose 6:41 p.m. to post this; sunset in Orlando. Happy Halloween.

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Relationship Advice and Black Metal Wednesday; Mayhem- Dawn of the Black Hearts (1995)

Halloween, the one day out of the year that women feel that it is socially acceptable to dress as slutty as they feel. Orlando with it’s warm, sub-tropical weather and abundance of UF alumni makes Halloween a real freak show.
Honestly, the last time I went downtown for Halloween I saw some asshole dressed in black-face and a minstrel costume, then realized that it was someone I had known for years… there is something about the heat and humidity of this town that brings out a crass, offensive sense of humor in everyone. By the end of October we have basically had seven months of summer, so everyone is in full asshole-mode. The bumper stickers explain how pissed-off everyone is, “Welcome to Florida, now go home”. Or even better is the Mexican driving around with the one that says “Welcome to the New World, now go home.”
And everyone is armed, combined with the heat and humidity results in the Stand Your Ground law, which basically says that Floridians can shoot at each other. Thus Halloween has the undertones of a festive riot, with a couple of drunken fights and lots of women wearing virtually nothing.
So, I will take pictures (if I’m not involved) and observe the weirdness up at Will’s Pub, which is hosting the traditional Misfits cover band (8th annual, I think).
I’ll answer one of Savage Love’s readers question again this week since no one has written, again.

I have a straight, 14 year old son, how do I talk to him about internet porno? My sister tells me that the average kid looks at internet porn at age 11!
-DAD

First off, why are you so certain he is straight? Does he not want to shower with you anymore? Besides for that, he is 14, of course he is looking at internet porn! He probably thinks you’re a prude because you don’t.
By age 11, I am guessing most kids have walked in on their parents playing hide-the-sausage. Hell, by that age Morges had learned not to walk onto the back porch in the middle of the night if she heard her mom and I back there…
Look, there is nothing to worry about, you just have a little too much time on your hands.

Savage Love

Today, we have Mayhem’s Dawn of the Black Hearts, a black metal classic from the very early days of the Norwegian scene.
Dead, is the stage name of the guy on the cover missing part of his head. His suicide note was “Sorry about the mess”, and when Euronymous found the body in the band’s house he did the logical thing and took pictures, ate some and made necklaces out of chunks of skull then called the police.
Dead would carry around a jar with a dead crow inside, occasionally he would open the jar and sniff it. Also, he would bury his cloths with dead things before shows so that he would have the proper smell about him and he was the first to wear corpse paint, because he wanted to look (and smell) like he was dead.
He was 22 when he died, perhaps he was the true Satanist, extinguishing his flame right when it burned the brightest, trying to leave this world at one’s peak. Or maybe he was just really twisted, but he had a profound effect upon black metal. His insanity lent a validity to the scene that helped propel the genre to a global audience.
The weirder aspects that could be called stupid or put-on this guy believed. Death would throw pig and sheep and goat heads into the audience during shows, driving away many show goers. He believed that if you didn’t want to get covered in gore and death then you had no business at a black metal show…

download Dawn of the Black Hearts

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⸮NEWS FLASH!⸮ Nutty Cock and Nuts Sodomy Zine CONTINUES!

The Nutty Cock and Sodomy ‘zine is slated to come out with issue #14 next month!!!
For those readers who aren’t from Orlando and don’t know Das But, he has a demented sense of humor which he deleveres with an absolute monotone voice, saying the most outrageous things with a stone cold expression. Supposedly,one time, things happened, one thing lead to another, bla bla bla, and the French government told him to leave France and never to speak of France or the French again…
Obviously he has good things to say if the country that doesn’t defend itself is butt-hurt by what he says.
So check out the link below that explains the history of the ‘zine and why those Food not Bombs turds are real clowns. If you like the art, help him out and send him a buck or two.

http://dasbut.com/

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Bullet LaVolta – S/T (1988)

Boston post punk from the late 80’s/ early 90’s that I happened across on YouTube. I’m not a big fan but it is interesting so I thought I would share.
Also, I posted a link to another (now defunct) blogspot review which is pretty good, and the link to their Wiki article. Random, old and obscure, a good one for the digital collection at least.

Another review
(Wiki)

download

King Oliver’s Creole Jazz Band (1923)

The other night I was watching some PBS show/documentary/ hug-ourselves-and-celebrate-multiculturalism-on-national-tv special, and this band was mentioned. It caught my attention because the was the band that Luis Armstrong was in when he first recorded playing a solo piece. I decided to research and do a post on this band since it is rare, relatively unheard of, and very early in the development of the genre, even though it is jazz.
Jazz might seem to be an odd choice for a post, however almost all the music posted here has descended from jazz in some form or another.
Also, King Oliver was a key figure in the development of the genre in the early years. He left the south early and became known as the jazz king in Chicago play as King Oliver and his Creole Jazz Band (Wiki) around 1922.
Despite early popularity his failings as a businessman ultimately doomed the band, turning down a key venue demanding more money… Duke Ellington took the gig, and the band moved on taking their place in jazz history without King Oliver.
However, this was the band in it’s time, and hands-down a collectible in every sense of the word. Back in the days of Napster (in the 1990’s) I would spend hours searching for early jazz like this only to limited avail, so I really appreciate this album, because early jazz and big band can be some the most maddening music to search for on the internet.
Early, scratchy recordings but still a must have for any collection, enjoy.

download the 1923 chronology

NIGHTSTICK- Ultimatum (1998)

Nightstick is sludge metal from Massachusetts and been around since 1992, are still active and on Relapse Records.
The music is ok, I decided to post them because they were on Relapse, but after researching them a bit I am rating the music as “listenable” and the band as “Massoles”. I can’t find any links for this album but I did find one for one of their EPs and I have a link below for that and their Metallum listing.

Metallum

a download of another one of their EPs

Burzum- Belus (2010)

This is Burzum’s first album after being released from prison and is unbelievable. It has been called the best metal album of the past decade by more than a few people.
Best Metal album, not even limiting it to Black Metal, is a pretty strong statement. Normally, I would try and refute such an obviously absurd statement, however, I can not readily think of another metal album that is as good as this, not even Ride the Lightening.
Yes, I dared to say it. Burzum is better than Metallica. Yes, Varg’s crazy ass playing all instruments, blows Metallica totally, utterly, and completely, out of the water. This one album makes Metallica and their entire discography look like the BS-Corporate-America-Metal that it really is.
This album is about the Norwegian Sun god, Baldr, and his daily trek across the sky. Belus is one if the oldest names for this god. Originally the album was to be entitled “The White God”, however, that name was deemed to be politically incorrect.

download

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Relationship Advice and Black Metal Wednesday; Savage Love Answers and Cirrhus- S/T (2011)

For this week’s Relationship Advice I am back to writing better responces for some of Savage Love’s write in questions. Most of the questions I will paraphrase but this first one is too good to paraphrase, check it out;
“I was wondering what you think about the Folsom Street Fair, the annual gay leather/fetish/BDSM street fair in San Francisco. Do you think it is still a socially relevant display? Or do you think that in this time when we are fighting for civil rights and equality that it does more harm than good?”

Answer-
Soooo, you’re gay, and you are trying to criticise the gay guys who want to walk around San Fran in leather in a snotty intellectual manner… which is gay, but just in a different way than the leather… Why do you think that gay events have to live up to your expectations of social relevance?
I bet you are the “bottom” aren’t you?
Look, if there ever was any social relevance to grown men walking around half naked dressed in chains and leather I don’t think it can be lost…

I am a female and my boyfriend recently bought a pair of butt-plugs for himself. I am willing (really meaning I want to) peg his ass with a strap on. But I also have IBS and am scared that I will crap on his finger if he probes my poop-shoot, and that would be embarrassing.
What should I do?

Answer;
A pair of butt-plugs?? Really? Let me guess, you are built like a brick shithouse and have hairy arms, right? Didn’t the fact that he got a pair for HIMSELF strike you as odd? Has he been to prison too? Let me guess, he has boobs tattooed on his back too, right?
Look, I hate to be the one to break the news to you, but if he is getting pairs of butt-plugs then it is a safe bet he is going to leave you for a man. Which I am guessing isn’t going to break your heart if you’re into using a strap-on on men. I am doubtful there will ever be the pitter-patter of little feet around your house.

I am a Strong Powerful Woman who likes sucking cock, and I am going to write an intellectual essay explaining why the world is wrong to judge the woman who plays the one-eyed meat whistle on the first date.
The Happy Whore
(no lie, she signed it that way)

Answer;
Ok…. Let me guess, you don’t have any children, live alone, are around 40 and have a corded vibrator.
Yeah, whatever floats your boat. You sound pretty snotty, about like NASCAR’s duffus woman lawyer friends… God, yeah suck dick, whatever makes you happy, but why are you writing essays about it?

Here is the actual Savage Love article;
Savage Love & the Fair

Cirrhus is a USBM horde out of Oregon playing chaotic punk styled black metal. This is a short two song demo, but good. Good riffs, vocals and background, nothing ground breaking or stunning but (yet again) something new.

(Metallum)

download

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