Relationship Advice and Black Metal Wednesday; Parental Guilt-Trips and Theoria- Mantra (2013)

The phrase “Productive Member of Society” has been often used by the Baby Boomer generation, which is ironic concidering that entire generation has been focused on retiring since they started working… retirement is when the individual stops being a productive member of society.
Seems that their logic is hypocritical and self-serving, they put their kids in daycare and shuffled them out of the house at eighteen so that they could prepare to stop working and sit on their asses ASAP. Theirs’ is the first generation to feel entitled to sit around and do nothing. Every generation before them expected to work until they died, our generation is going to work until we die, so where do the Baby Boomers get off expecting a free ride because they worked all of forty years?
Watch, their next catch phrase is going to be “Honor thy mother and father”, which in reality is the preamble to some explaination as to why their children should do something for them… Something that they could take care of themselves, but feel they are entitled to be provided whatever service they happen to be attempting to guilt-trip out of their children.
The Baby Boomers are really the “Me” generation, everything is about them, always has been and always will be. They put their children in daycare not because they thought it the best for the children, but because it was easier for themselves, just like the divorces.
Honoring thy mother and father is a two way street in the sense that the parents have an implied obligation to do more than the bare minium for their children, which is not what the Me Generation has ever been about.
They have some perverse, ingrained logic that they should get the better end of all deals, every time. This is the reason why, as a group, women of this generation are wretched in the field of business. The men are barely any better though and as a generation they twist, skew and apply arbitrary judgement to try and weasel the best deal possible. Watching a pair of Baby Boomers try and do business is like watching a Jew at a Gypsy’s yard sale.
I’m just saying these old fuckers are going to be around for another fifty years, so be warned the Me generation and their antics are only going to get worse.
(It’s not like they’re going to wake up some morning and suddenly stop being assholes.)

Theoria is Atmospheric Black Metal made in Syrian city of Aleppo and released May of this year. Atmospheric Black Metal recorded in the midst of an urban civil war, this album definatly has more emotion and feeling than most of the Yuppispheric Black Metal that is the reigning trend these days. A duo, with one writing and the other playing and both doing vocals. It sounds like an odd set-up for a band but they pull it off remarkably well with a sound slightly reminiscent of Emperor. The sound isn’t over-produced and sterile, nor is it muddy and distorted, it has a pleasant flow and it is offered for free.
A good atmospheric black metal album, released in a year of few quality releases and recorded in a war zone, this ranks a solid 91%.

Metallum

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Finnish Death Metal: Belial- Wisdom of Darkness (1992)

Time for another round of the Random Tag Game! Today it’s “Finnish Death Metal” which has yielded Belial and a monstrous work of Blackened Death. Back in 1992 Black Metal hadn’t yet crystallized as a genre, it was growing out of death metal circles and this album captures that moment beautifully, with great blast beats and growled vocals, a stellar EP from a little known band; 92%.
Apparently they went in a somewhat mainstream direction later in the band’s career according to this Metallum review, but this release is defiantly quality.

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Random Download Game; Penance- Bridges to Burn (1998)

It’s time for the Random Download Game! This has yielded some truely great finds such as Tortoise and Baby Woodrose among others, however, this is not one of those days. A demo released back in 1998 that seems to have taken the crappy influences of that decade and crammed them all into one big pile, kinda like cleaning out a horse stall.
Wretched is the only way to explain it. This is some sort of Butt-Rock hybred and these guys had eyebrow piercings, I’m sure. The riffs are generic and basic, the vocalist is the same, almost a cover band of radio rock. He talks about his “pain” way too much, this is crap doom, 55%.

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I wasn’t able to find a YouTube video of any of the songs on this demo, but I did manage to find another of their songs which isn’t quite as bad, but gives a good idea of the sound that the demo has;

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Old Testament

Here we have a new and relatively unknown band, Old Testament, a stoner/psychedelic/indie rock band out of LA with Dead Meadow’s vocalist/guitarist, Jason Simon. While not as refined an act, they are definatly talented and these are good session songs.
Their cover of Dollar Bill Blues is easily my favorite of the three songs they’ve released this year. An interesting mix of new and old sounds, and a definite must hear for Dead Meadow fans, I’m looking forward to hearing more music from them, 85%.

Bandcamp

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Relationship Advice and Black Metal Wednesday; Covelo and Sannhet- Known Flood (2013)

Here in Central Florida there is an unusually large population of Yankees (peoples originating north of the Mason-Dixon Line). The Angry Ginger claims that they are the Yankees who couldn’t cut it in New York.
Covelo, California was a magical place, remote and mountainous with only one road into the valley during the winter, 28 miles off US 101 in the middle of an Indian reservation. With a population of less than 2,000 there are two types of people in Round Valley; Indians and everyone else.
A friend moved there in 2005 when it truly was the Wild West, the mine had shut down years before and Mendocino as a county was suffering economically. There wasn’t even a bar for the Indians to get drunk at, that is, until Proposition 215 . That changed everything, suddenly scores of young men were drawn to this desolate valley earning ridiculous incomes with virtually no law enforcement short of federal DEA agents flying over head in blacked-out helicopters. The sheriff’ department took over an hour to respond to 911 calls, on a good day. The tribal police only responded to calls concerning nonIndians if there was an excessive amount of gunfire.
Never did I see a Yankee out in The Valley, not once was I threatened by some Yankee clown disapproving of my driving habits, threatening to “fuck your shit up” out of a cracked car window.
The Angry Ginger is correct, they couldn’t cut it in New York and that is why they fled to Florida. A flood of Loser-Refugees that calls 911 when anyone yells back at them, flowing down Interstate 95 like a great exodus of human sewage.
Honestly, the only proper way to respond to these asshole Yankees is to ignore them. It is like a toddler having a temper tantrum, acknowledging their bad behavior only encourages more bad behavior. Also, that way door-wacking momentum works against the loud-mouth idiot approaching a vehicle (as the Professor once demonstrated to good effect).

Today we have Sannhet’s Known Flood, which is instrumental, exprimental, post-rockish/shoegaze black metal. Released February of this year this freshman full length album is good, but the atmospheric style has already been well played and charging $7 for a digital download seems unrealistic and conceited. Too many looped background noises and too much of the musical territory has already been trampled by similar bands in recent years, though not bad per se, it earns a solid C score of 75%.

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Vital Remains- Dechristianize (2003)

Sorry about last week’s lack of a Relationship Advice and Black Metal Wednesday post, I was slacking, but there will be one this Wednesday. Also, this is the beginning of Leroy Pics, which is pretty self explanatory, as Leroy is my dog.
Vital Remains is an act from Rhode Island playing quality death metal. Excellent death metal actually, but it is way too early (8 am) to be listening to metal, drowsy and half awake. Good death metal, but the production leaves it sounding a bit flat. The drummer is astounding, partially carrying this album because without his talent this could easily have sounded like cheese-death metal. The vocals are good, but not overly noteworthy, the guitar solos are too much, the songs and album are too long and turn what could have been a good album into a weak, drawn-out album, 78%.

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More reviews- Metallum Reviews

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Elvira’s Mom and Farallon- Stellar Descent / Aylwin split (2013)

Recently, CCRR observed that the feral cats in the neighborhood were putting on weight. Logically speaking, there had to be an explanation for this, and thus began The Mystery of the Fat Cats. “Coincidently” we also noticed the crazy old lady that lived in one of the apartments across the street (Elvira’s Mom), was moving.
After several seconds of intense concentration we deduced the only logical explanation for the feral cat’s weight gain is that Elvira’s Mom has been feeding the cats.
In the light of the moon she duck-walks naked into the front yard of the apartments with a can of raw tuna stuffed into her orifices, then, standing still as a statue, she waits for the feral cats to approach and feed, like a hunter. When the street light momentarily flickers back on, she throws a blanket over herself like Frodo, in Lord of the Rings and, disguises herself as a rock.

Today we have the Farralon split featuring Stellar Descent and Aylwin, a black metal band and an atmospheric blackened post-rock band. The split has the typical California-Cool-Kid in so far as they only made 10 physical copies (hand numbered, of course), then, later, another twenty, other than that it is free and Bandcamp-only at the moment, which is real nice.
The first track is by Aylwin and while listenable, it is too long and the whole blackened atmospheric and post-rock sounds have been pretty well explored, and this track belonged in the last slot, not the first. It would have fit into the flow much better at that spot, sleepy songs aren’t good first songs.
The second and third tracks are by Stellar Descent and is in actuality just one good, long, soaring song. While thoroughly black metal an acoustic guitar is used to good effect, and while some might call the part with the Canadian geese (I’m not kidding) a bit much, I still enjoy this song and it carries this split into the category of one of this years best releases to date.
It is rare now a days to see a band explore new sounds from a purely black metal perspective (most attempts are just cover bands who forgot the original lyrics), 89%.

Bandcamp

And here we have a picture from DasBüt and the latest Nutty Cock and Nuts Sodomy ‘zine

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http://dasbut.com/

Relationship Advice and Black Metal Wednesday; Female Politicians and Eater of Souls, Mirror of the World(2013)

Wendy Davis stood and talked for thirteen hours on the floor of the Texas Senate because some clown gave her a microphone and told her everyone had to sit and listen so long as she could talk. And talk she did, for ten long hours. She spoke under the guise of blocking new abortion legislation, but her real motivation was the captive audience forced to listen to her opinions.
Honestly, I’m surprised this doesn’t occur more often considering the number of female politicians in this country. Hell, this might be why women were barred from public office for so long. It is weird how women can take an issue that inherently revolves around dead babies and turn it into torturing men for ten hours. And she is threatening to run for governor of Texas… It’ll be like church, an hour a week. I can see it already, every male Texan must appear every week and listen to that bag spout off for an hour, under pain of neutering.
It is inevitable, just as Sulla and the military coup lead to the fall of the Roman Republic, female politicians will inevitably lead to all mankind being required to submit to state dictated female tirades. Our testes will be surgically removed and entrusted to our wives if we continue to allow women to vote. That woman spouting-off for ten hours was the tip of the iceberg. Everyone will believe me when they get an official notice from Hillary Clinton telling them to go to their nearest veterinary office at their earliest convince.

Today’s Black Metal selection is Eater of Souls’ EP, Mirror of the World. An atmospheric solo-project out of the Netherlands, this freshman release is masterfully compiled and while the atmospheric black metal is getting a bit played, this is so well executed that it deserves recognition as one of this years good releases, 87%.

Bandcamp

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