A couple days late…
Blocking doorways and asles is a good indication of a moron, it’s on the rise and its all because of smart phones. There’s no getting around it, and nine times out of ten these clowns are going to be holding a smart phone. It’s as if they are the only people in the universe, adrift in a sea we call the grocery. Smart phones have ruined a generation that was already pretty worthless and are causing societies to degrade, the idiots are becoming dumber and more numerous, all because of the smart phone.
Along with the technological convenience of these phones comes the popularity of Duck Dynasty along the general dumbing down of American, and western society in general. Duck Dynasty is the televised version of crystal meth, rotting holes in minds already addled by smart phones and reality TV. At this point it is obvious the methamphetamine problem and Duck Dynasty are symptoms of a problem and not the cause of it. Television might has dumbed us down, but the smart phone kicked the average American over the edge into the abyss of total retardation.
The average American doesn’t want to think. Its hard. They spend 40 hours a week being told what to do by an employer and the remainder of the time they are told what to do by their phones. It’s easier this way. No need to waste time with difficult and time consuming thinking.
Reality TV is merely filming how people act out of cell phone range and calling it entertainment.
I wrote this section of the post late and in my rush to brainstorm it struck me that after 62 posts and in the year 2014, there is not much new to add to black metal.
Most of the notables I have already touched upon and now I’d like to write about new bands and the direction of the genre (as my phone battery goes down to 30%).
Supposing that if enough metal heads are talking about a band then there should be something worth reporting, I start the quest at Encyclopedia Metallum. While not the end-all authority on metal it is a good place to start, or so I thought. It seems there is no general consensus on the direction of black metal among the blogosphere’s leading metalheads. Perhaps Burzum’s album Belrus is the period at the end of the Black Metal sentence.
Bandcamp seems to be the face of new music so I renew the quest there, with bands sorted by popularity. Among the top five “Black Metal” bands I find Thantifaxath, a Canadian trio, with reviews claiming they’re, basically, “true black metal”, which sounds promising along with a decent review on Metallum of their first release.
Strike. Way too clean sounding, too generic and all over the place, and the vocals lean more towards doom than black metal. Even with the questionable vocals this brand new album is “true” black metal without a doubt… but it is basically a black metal album put to a technical death metal format also, 77%.
So the quest continues with the hope that black metal isn’t dead.