Relationship Advice and Black Metal Wednesday; Why Women Love Shopping and October Falls- The Plague Of A Coming Age (2013)

Women love shopping, their souls feed off it as a hummingbird does nectar. The only time women don’t enjoy shopping is when a male close to them (husband/boyfriend) is present and smiling. For women that is like trying to enjoy a cup of coffee and a joint in the middle of a kindergarten class. That’s why women detest going to Home Depot.
Before civilization humans lived as hunter-gathers, women gathered nuts and berries and that is the reason they take such joy in shopping. Twisted as it may sound, women who don’t like to shop are normally off as individuals.
The industrial revolution has made the world a giant berry bush for women, which means ten thousand years ago women refusing to shop translated into refusing to do their part for the village. Thus shopping is bred into them the way dogs are loyal (10,000 years ago the dogs who didn’t like people we today call wolves). As for making men frown… Really, I have no idea, women are just evil.

October Falls, The Plague Of A Coming Age (2013)
Finnish dark/folk/ambient/”pagan” metal… Honestly, this album has sat for a couple months waiting for me to write this review, and for some reason I was thinking it was going to be good. Boy was I wrong. It sounds like Dragon Force and Slipknot combined into a super-group. I have no clue how it received an eighty eight percent on Metallum.
Over produced, too clean sounding, the vocals are sung, and with way too much feeling and emotion, the guitar riffs are lame and they want 6.5 euros for a digital download. The only real credit I can give this album is that other people seem to enjoy it, maybe I’m missing something here but I see it as a rather poor album; 61%.

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Svarte Greiner- Knife (2006)

I’m not the only one to say it, but there have been almost no good metal albums released this year, so in my wanderings through the blogosphere I came across an ambient/doom band, Svarte Greiner. Ambient/doom/soundscape, a solo project of some Norwegian guy that is somewhat well-known because of another band he is in that, I haven’t heard of either.
Dark, creepy, doom influenced soundscape, well produced and slow. Intense mood music, the type of album that is to be played on a dark, rainy night with a horror movie playing on mute… While mood-music to the extreme, it still rates an 83% because it is excellent, at certain times.

Last FM

DL

buy

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Kilamanjaro Dark Jazz Ensemble- I Foresee the Dark Ahead, If I Stay (2011) Live

The Kilamanjaro Darkjazz Ensemble is music for silent movies. Best way to describe them. Founded in 2000 in the Netherlands they have expanded from originally two members to seven giving their jazz a deep atmospheric texture that makes it perfect session music.
This album is composed of live recordings from shows in the Netherlands, Poland, Spain, Slovakia, and Hungry and is offered for free download and streaming via Bandcamp.

free download and streaming on Bandcamp

iPod Roulette | Finnr’s Cane

Thursday, time for iPod Roulette!

Finnr’s Cane came up today, I don’t recall downloading this band and listening to their first video on YouTube I can say that they aren’t too bad for ambient black metal.
Metallum
reviews on Metallum
After reading the Metallum article about this band I discovered that part of their interesting sound comes from them using the cello for the bass aspects of their music.
Overall though, post-black metal/dark-ambient is a thoughly explored genre and this band is not overly innovative. And evidently they jealousy guard their music so I was unable to find a download. The cello is a novel idea but “novel” is about as good as it gets, earning them a score of 55%.
The entire genre has become a collection of cover bands playing not the same songs, but the same style song with different riffs, and this is a prime example.

offical site